An · Artist's · Aria

have you ever just kind of let life happen to you, and shove all your responisibilites to the side for fun? i totally have been doing that.
and now i'm in the reconstructing phase where i pick up the scattered pieces of my life and try to fit them together.
i am up at 4:38 am.
why?
because i can't sleep.
why?
because all of these tiny little insignificant tasks i've ignored have joined forces and attack my conscience until i surrender and finally organize everything into neat little segments of time that will ease my conscience and then spiral back into blind comfort.
well, hopefully i'll do a few of them before i throw it all out the window again.
absolutely every aspect of my life needs to be reigned in.
i literally haven't brushed my hair in probably 2 weeks.
most of my clothes are dirty.
my room is a mess.
my homework is unfinished.
my sleep schedule is out of whack.
i owe money, i need to return things to people, i have unfinished art projects scattered everywhere.
i throw myself into projects, get halfway done, and forget about it.
why can't i just finish?
what is so scary about finishing?
is it that the final product won't be perfect?
that i think i need more time?
i don't know.
but i need to fix it.
and that is why i can't sleep at 4:38 am.

1. the phrase sexy hot
2. literary devices
3. scrabble
4. 80's/90's old skool rap
5. looking forward to getting old and acting senile
6. naming things (for example, my laptop is named gertrude and my printer is marvin.)
7. spinach
8. wearing a helmet when you ride your bike (safety is cool.)
9. eating with chopsticks whenever possible.
10. comebacks consisting solely of repeating back what the other person said.
"this computer is as slow as a dinosaur."
"YOU'RE as slow as a dinosaur!"
11. corny jokes involving rappers.
"why does snoop dogg need an umbrella?"
"FO DRIZZLE!"

"what does 50 cent use to do his laundry?"
"BLE-ATCH!"

i am SO SORE from weight lifting.
ahhhh.
like everywhere.
awesome night tonight, even though the day sucked because i slept through two classes.
chilled with kellie.
i had old coupons from being student of the month (how did THAT happen?), so we got free food from wendys and del taco (took FOREVER...they eventually had to bring it out for us, a bit embarassing...we were laughing so hard)
ate it at the park.
went to her house, played guitar, chilled with her family.
i'm going over there for sunday dinner yay!!!
her mom is an amazing cook.
i love their family.
she's so close, it's AWESOME.
we listened to the music & lyrics soundtrack, awesome.
hahhaa.
i love kellie so much.
we go wayyy back.
yay for reminiscing on the car ride home.
:)

it rocks so much to be on my own.
knowing that i am responsible for everything.
it's just amazing.
i don't miss anyone.
i know that sounds terrible.
but i am so excited.
incredibly.
i'm glad my friends are coming tomorrow because when i walked on campus i was just hit with a feeling of loneliness, i don't know anyone except amanda.
i need to rent movies.
i've been watching heroes online, pretty entertaining.
if anyone knows where i can find other movies/tv shows online please do tell.
:)
my closet doors look awesome.
i'll post pics if i can later.
my dad set up my new printer with gertrude.
his name is marvin.
i want to paint something, but i don't have any paints.
I'M FREE WOOOOOHOOOOO!!!!!

i finally broke up with devan, what a relief. he's totally taking it well too.

now on to the next one.

chris hill.

not my type but a total cutie.

good mormon boy (a change since ive only dated nonmembers since i got here), totally sweet, seems interested in me, CUTE CUTE CUTE, cooks, loves chick flicks, is working two jobs to go on his mission, in sbo, total prep though, (again, not my type.)but he's adorable and says he loves texting me and wants to hang out and AHHH says SUCH nice things like that im "outrageously attractive" daaang.
but my type sucks.
what is it? rocker. nonchalant. funny. cute.
yep, not much to go on there.
that would be trent and devan.
i guess jon goes more in the category that chris is in though.
he was funny and really cared about people.
but then i had to go and break his heart, so you know.

i am so excited about byu, i got my housing and everything. wyview with cat, maddie and some other girl we dont know. sooo stoked beyond belief. our dorm (?) is going to be party central! haha. and i am excited for all the guys. ohh man im gonna go date crazy, well, that is if i dont scare them off.

four more ap tests to go, government's off the list though.
english lit. english lang. art history. art.

1. Open your music library in whatever player you want.
2. Put it on shuffle.
3. Press play.
4. For every question, type the song that’s playing.
5. When you go to a new question, press the Next button.

Opening Credits: black diamond-KISS
Waking Up: El Condor Pasa-simon&garfunkel
Falling in Love: while my guitar gently weeps-the beatles
Fight scene: turbo lover-judas priest
Breaking up: tommy, can you hear me?-the who
Getting back together: daydream believer-the monkees
Secret Love: captain kelly's kitchen-the dropkick murphys
Life's okay: birthday-the beatles
Mental breakdown: another one bites the dust-queen
Driving Flashback: panama-van halen
Partying: wild child-the doors
Happy Dance: stone free-jimi hendrix
Regretting: st. vitus' dance-black sabbath
Long night alone: the war's end-rancid
Final Battle: the pilgrim-iron maiden
Death scene: the call up-the clash
End credits: the evil that men do-iron maiden

What does next year have in store for me?
manic depression-jimi hendrix (ahh i hope not!)

Whats my love life like?
touch me-the doors (oooh...)

What do I say when life gets hard?
i believe in miracles-the ramones

What do I think when I get up in the morning?
young lust-pink floyd (bwahaha.)

What song will I dance to at my wedding?
d'yer mak'r-led zeppelin (sure, i love this song...prob not appropriate for a wedding though)

What do you want as a career?
magic bus-guess who (chyeah!)

Your favorite saying?
between love and hate-the strokes

Favorite place?
at the zoo-simon&garfunkel (haha yes!)

What do you think of your parents?
love hungry man-ac/dc (um....lol)

Where would you go on a first date?
substitute-sex pistols

Describe yourself?
free-wheelin'-bto (fuh sho.)

What is the thing I like doing most?
jawbreaker-judas priest (for sure.)

The song that best describes my school principal?
maybe i'm amazed-paul mccartney

What is my state of mind like at the moment?
i can't wait-the white stripes (true! can't wait for the christmas dance!)

How will i die?
going to california-led zeppelin (good way to go.)

The song you'll put as the subject?
eleanor rigby-the beatles

If Your Life were a movie, what would your soundtrack be?
So, here's how it works:
1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button

Opening Credits:
right now-van halen

Waking Up:
all you need is love-the beatles

First Day At School:
jack the stripper/faeiries wear boots-black sabbath

Falling In Love:
soul kitchen-the doors

Fight Song:
four wheel drive-bto

Breaking Up:
stop-pink floyd

Prom:
solitude-black sabbath

Mental Breakdown:
cheating on you-franz ferdinand

Driving:
school's out-alice cooper

Flashback:
futures-jimmy eat world

Getting Back Together:
run like hell-pink floyd (haha)

Wedding:
peace-weezer

Birth of Child:
this fire- franz ferdinand

Final Battle:
a hard day's night-the beatles

Death Scene:
in my life-the beatles (wow, lots of beatles)

Funeral Song:
d'yer mak'r-led zeppelin

End Credits:
she's like heroin-system of a down (hahhaa.)

crackhead night. hahahha.

trent and landon came over. we watched futurama, the simpsons and the colbert report.
hilights of the evening:
- marker fight
- reading cat books
- people laying on each other (trent and landon)
- playing with giraffes
- paper mache mushrooms
- the word tight
- milkshakes
- crazy train

yess. haha. the most hilarious/retarded evening in a long time.